阿德勒，一個改變世界的叛逆者
從「瘸腿阿德勒」到優秀醫師
1876年的維也納，雪花紛飛的冬日，在一個富麗堂皇的商人豪宅裡，傳來了嬰兒微弱的哭聲。這個孩子叫阿德勒（Alfred Adler），他的父親是城裡最成功的穀物商人，母親來自德國的音樂世家。按理說，這個孩子應該擁有完美的人生開端。
In Vienna in 1876, on a snowy winter day, weak cries of a baby echoed through an opulent merchant mansion. This child was named Alfred Adler. His father was the city's most successful grain merchant, and his mother came from a German musical family. By all accounts, this child should have had a perfect start in life.
但命運總是愛開玩笑。小阿德勒患有嚴重的佝僂病，走路搖搖晃晃，身材瘦小，在學校裡經常被同學嘲笑為「瘸腿阿德勒」。每當體育課時，他只能坐在角落看著其他孩子奔跑嬉戲，心中既羨慕又自卑。
But fate loves to play tricks. Little Adler suffered from severe rickets, walked unsteadily, and was small in stature. At school, he was often mocked by classmates as "Limping Adler." During PE classes, he could only sit in the corner watching other children run and play, feeling both envious and inferior.
「我永遠都不會像他們一樣強壯，」小阿德勒曾經在日記裡這樣寫道。但就是這個被嘲笑的孩子，後來憑藉驚人的意志力，不僅克服了身體的缺陷，還考進了維也納大學醫學系，成為一名優秀的醫生。
"I will never be as strong as them," little Adler once wrote in his diary. But it was this mocked child who later, through amazing willpower, not only overcame his physical defects but also got into Vienna University's medical school and became an excellent doctor.
佛洛伊德與阿德勒
更戲劇性的是，阿德勒在醫學界嶄露頭角後，被當時最著名的心理學家佛洛伊德相中，邀請他加入精神分析學會。那是1902年的一個秋天，佛洛伊德在他的診所裡對阿德勒說：「年輕人，你的醫學見解很獨特，我想你會成為精神分析的重要推手。」
More dramatically, after Adler emerged in the medical field, he was spotted by Freud, the most famous psychologist of the time, who invited him to join the Psychoanalytic Society. It was an autumn day in 1902 when Freud said to Adler in his clinic: "Young man, your medical insights are unique. I think you'll become an important promoter of psychoanalysis."
起初，阿德勒對佛洛伊德充滿敬意，他們經常在維也納的咖啡館裡討論人類心理的奧秘。但隨著時間的推移，兩人的理念分歧越來越大。佛洛伊德認為人的行為主要由性衝動驅使，而阿德勒則認為人更多是被自卑感和追求優越感所驅動。
Initially, Adler held great respect for Freud, and they often discussed the mysteries of human psychology in Vienna's coffee houses. But as time passed, their ideological differences grew larger. Freud believed human behavior was mainly driven by sexual impulses, while Adler thought people were more driven by feelings of inferiority and the pursuit of superiority.
走自己道路的阿德勒
1911年的一個雨夜，在一次激烈的學會會議後，阿德勒決定離開佛洛伊德的圈子。「我們的道路不同，」阿德勒對佛洛伊德說，「我相信人性本善，每個人都有改變的能力。」佛洛伊德冷冷地回答：「那你就走你的路吧，阿德勒。」
On a rainy night in 1911, after an intense society meeting, Adler decided to leave Freud's circle. "Our paths are different," Adler told Freud. "I believe human nature is fundamentally good, and everyone has the capacity to change." Freud coldly replied: "Then go your own way, Adler."
就這樣，這位曾經被嘲笑的「瘸腿男孩」建立了自己的「個體心理學會」，開創了一套完全不同於佛洛伊德的心理治療方法。他的理論不僅影響了無數心理學家，更重要的是，它給了普通人獲得幸福的實用方法。
Thus, this once-mocked "limping boy" established his own "Individual Psychology Society," creating a psychological treatment method completely different from Freud's. His theories not only influenced countless psychologists but, more importantly, provided ordinary people with practical methods for achieving happiness.
（資料來源：Youtube.com- PsychoLogic, ALFRED ADLER'S THEORY OF PERSONALITY. Inferiority Complex, Personal Goals, Self-fulfilment. CBSE）
阿德勒的第一個魔法：時光機的秘密
小美的深層困擾
台北信義區的一棟辦公大樓裡，28歲的小美正盯著電腦螢幕上的公司聚餐邀請，手心已經開始冒汗。這已經是今年第五次了，每次看到這種邀請，她的胃就開始絞痛，彷彿有無數隻螞蟻在裡面爬行。
In an office building in Taipei's Xinyi District, 28-year-old Xiao Mei was staring at a company dinner invitation on her computer screen, her palms already starting to sweat. This was the fifth time this year. Every time she saw such invitations, her stomach would start cramping as if countless ants were crawling inside.
小美的同事們都覺得她很奇怪。她工作能力很強，平時在辦公室裡也很健談，但一提到公司聚餐就像變了個人。「小美，這次的聚餐在那家新開的義式餐廳耶，聽說超好吃的！」同事小如興奮地說。小美勉強擠出笑容：「我...我可能有事，你們去玩吧。」
Xiao Mei's colleagues all thought she was strange. She was very capable at work and quite talkative in the office, but she became a different person when company dinners were mentioned. "Xiao Mei, this dinner is at that newly opened Italian restaurant! I heard it's super delicious!" her colleague Xiao Ru said excitedly. Xiao Mei forced a smile: "I... I might have something to do. You guys go have fun."
每次拒絕後，小美都會回到自己的座位上，腦海中不由自主地浮現五年前那個噩夢般的夜晚。那是她剛進這家公司的第二週，公司在一家高級法式餐廳舉辦歡迎新人的聚餐。小美精心打扮，穿上了她最漂亮的白色洋裝，想要給同事們留下好印象。
After each refusal, Xiao Mei would return to her seat, and her mind would involuntarily recall that nightmarish evening five years ago. It was her second week at the company, and they held a welcome dinner for new employees at an upscale French restaurant. Xiao Mei had dressed up carefully, wearing her most beautiful white dress, wanting to make a good impression on her colleagues.
餐廳裡燭光搖曳，氣氛溫馨。小美坐在老闆陳總的右手邊，感到既興奮又緊張。當服務生為她倒紅酒時，她想要優雅地舉起酒杯向陳總敬酒，但不知道是因為緊張還是光線昏暗，她的手肘撞到了服務生的手臂。瞬間，整杯紅酒如血色瀑布般濺到了陳總雪白的襯衫上。
The restaurant was filled with flickering candlelight and a warm atmosphere. Xiao Mei sat to the right of Boss Chen, feeling both excited and nervous. When the waiter poured red wine for her, she wanted to elegantly raise her glass to toast Boss Chen, but whether due to nervousness or dim lighting, her elbow bumped into the waiter's arm. Instantly, the entire glass of red wine splashed onto Boss Chen's snow-white shirt like a crimson waterfall.
整個餐廳瞬間安靜下來，所有人的目光都聚焦在小美身上。陳總的表情從驚訝轉為尷尬，再轉為勉強的微笑：「沒關係，沒關係，只是一件襯衫而已。」但小美清楚地看到他眼中的不悦，以及其他同事竊竊私語的樣子。那一刻，她恨不得地上有個洞可以鑽進去。
The entire restaurant fell silent instantly, with all eyes focused on Xiao Mei. Boss Chen's expression changed from surprise to embarrassment, then to a forced smile: "It's okay, it's okay, it's just a shirt." But Xiao Mei clearly saw the displeasure in his eyes and the whispering looks of other colleagues. At that moment, she wished there was a hole in the ground she could crawl into.
從那晚開始，小美就再也沒有參加過任何公司聚餐。起初她告訴自己這只是暫時的，等風頭過了就好，但隨著時間推移，這種迴避已經成為了一種習慣，一種她無法擺脫的心理枷鎖。
From that night on, Xiao Mei never attended any company dinners again. Initially, she told herself it was just temporary, that things would get better once the incident was forgotten, but as time passed, this avoidance had become a habit, a psychological shackle she couldn't break free from.
兩位心理醫師的深度診斷：佛洛伊德理論 vs 阿德勒理論
一個月後，在朋友的建議下，小美決定尋求心理諮詢。她先去看了一位佛洛伊德學派的心理醫師王醫師。王醫師的診所布置得很典雅，牆上掛著佛洛伊德的肖像，書櫃裡擺滿了精神分析的經典著作。
A month later, on a friend's suggestion, Xiao Mei decided to seek psychological counseling. She first visited Dr. Wang, a Freudian psychologist. Dr. Wang's clinic was elegantly decorated, with Freud's portrait hanging on the wall and bookshelves filled with classic psychoanalytic works.
王醫師仔細聽完小美的敘述後，調整了一下眼鏡，語重心長地說：「小美，妳的問題很典型。這叫做創傷後壓力症候群(PTSD)。五年前那次羞辱性的經歷在妳的潛意識中留下了深深的烙印，現在每當面臨類似情境，妳的大腦就會自動觸發保護機制，讓妳產生身體症狀來避免重蹈覆轍。」
After carefully listening to Xiao Mei's account, Dr. Wang adjusted his glasses and said earnestly: "Xiao Mei, your problem is very typical. This is called Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD). That humiliating experience five years ago left a deep imprint in your subconscious. Now, whenever you face similar situations, your brain automatically triggers a protective mechanism, causing physical symptoms to avoid repeating the mistake."
他繼續解釋：「根據因果論(Causality Theory)，妳現在的迴避行為是由過去的創傷直接造成的。我們需要進行長期的暴露療法(Exposure Therapy)，讓妳逐漸重新體驗那晚的情景，直到妳能夠正視並接受那個經歷。這個過程可能會很痛苦，但這是治癒的必經之路。」
He continued explaining: "According to Causality Theory, your current avoidance behavior is directly caused by past trauma. We need to conduct long-term Exposure Therapy, gradually letting you re-experience that night's scenario until you can face and accept that experience. This process might be painful, but it's the necessary path to healing."
小美聽後感到更加沮喪。她不想一遍遍地回憶那個痛苦的夜晚，光是想到就讓她全身發抖。一週後，她決定再找另一位心理醫師諮詢
After hearing this, Xiao Mei felt even more depressed. She didn't want to relive that painful night over and over again; just thinking about it made her whole body tremble. A week later, she decided to consult another psychologist.
這次她找到了李醫師，一位阿德勒學派的心理治療師。李醫師的診所完全不同，牆上掛著勵志標語，擺放著綠色植物，整個環境讓人感到溫暖和希望。
This time she found Dr. Li, an Adlerian psychotherapist. Dr. Li's clinic was completely different, with inspirational slogans on the walls and green plants placed around, creating an environment that felt warm and hopeful.
李醫師聽完小美的故事後，竟然笑了笑：「小美，我想問妳一個問題：妳真的是因為害怕再次發生尷尬事件才不參加聚餐的嗎？」
After hearing Xiao Mei's story, Dr. Li actually smiled: "Xiao Mei, I want to ask you a question: Are you really not attending dinners because you're afraid of another embarrassing incident?"
小美愣住了：「當然是啊，不然還能是什麼原因？」
Xiao Mei was stunned: "Of course, what other reason could there be?"
李醫師繼續問：「那讓我們換個角度思考。如果明天妳的老闆因為出差無法參加聚餐，只是同事們的普通聚會，妳會去嗎？」
Dr. Li continued asking: "Then let's think from another angle. If tomorrow your boss couldn't attend the dinner due to a business trip, and it was just a casual gathering of colleagues, would you go?"
小美想了想：「可能...也不會吧。」
Xiao Mei thought for a moment: "Probably... still wouldn't."
「那如果是在妳家樓下的小餐廳，非常熟悉的環境呢？」李醫師追問。
"What if it was at a small restaurant downstairs from your home, a very familiar environment?" Dr. Li pressed.
小美發現自己還是會找藉口拒絕，這讓她開始懷疑自己的真實動機。
Xiao Mei found that she would still make excuses to refuse, which made her start questioning her true motives.
李醫師溫和地說：「根據阿德勒的目的論(Teleology)，我相信妳不參加聚餐並不是因為五年前的事件，而是因為妳現在不想參加。那個紅酒事件只是妳潛意識為了合理化這個選擇而找的完美藉口。」
Dr. Li said gently: "According to Adler's Teleology, I believe you don't attend dinners not because of the incident five years ago, but because you currently don't want to attend. That wine incident is just the perfect excuse your subconscious found to rationalize this choice."
驚人的自我發現
李醫師的話像一道閃電劈中了小美的內心。她開始仔細思考自己的真實感受：「其實...我確實不喜歡那些應酬場合。我不喜歡必須保持微笑，不喜歡說一些言不由衷的話，更不喜歡那種虛假的和諧氣氛。」
Dr. Li's words struck Xiao Mei's heart like lightning. She began to carefully examine her true feelings: "Actually... I really don't like those social occasions. I don't like having to maintain a smile, don't like saying insincere things, and especially don't like that fake harmonious atmosphere."
她繼續挖掘自己的內心：「在家裡，我可以穿著舒服的睡衣，看我喜歡的韓劇，吃我愛吃的零食，不用擔心說錯話或做錯事。那種自由自在的感覺...確實比參加聚餐要快樂得多。」
She continued exploring her inner feelings: "At home, I can wear comfortable pajamas, watch my favorite Korean dramas, eat my favorite snacks, without worrying about saying or doing the wrong thing. That free and easy feeling... is indeed much happier than attending dinners."
李醫師點點頭：「妳看，妳的潛意識是很聰明的。它選擇了一個讓妳更舒適的生活方式，然後從記憶庫中找到了紅酒事件作為支撐這個選擇的理由。這並不是妳的錯，也不是什麼需要治療的疾病，這只是妳現在的目的驅動的行為選擇。」
Dr. Li nodded: "You see, your subconscious is very clever. It chose a lifestyle that makes you more comfortable, then found the wine incident from your memory bank as a reason to support this choice. This isn't your fault, nor is it a disease that needs treatment. It's just a behavioral choice driven by your current purpose."
小美感到一陣前所未有的輕鬆：「那我該怎麼辦呢？我總不能一輩子都不參加任何聚餐吧？」
Xiao Mei felt an unprecedented sense of relief: "Then what should I do? I can't avoid all dinners for the rest of my life, can I?"
李醫師微笑著說：「問題不在於妳要不要參加聚餐，而在於妳要如何誠實面對自己的選擇。如果妳真的不喜歡這種社交活動，那就大方地承認，不需要用過去的事件作藉口。但如果妳發現不參加這些活動影響了妳的職業發展或人際關係，那就需要重新評估妳的目的是什麼。」
Dr. Li smiled and said: "The issue isn't whether you should attend dinners, but how to honestly face your choices. If you really don't like this kind of social activity, then graciously admit it without using past events as excuses. But if you find that not attending these activities affects your career development or interpersonal relationships, then you need to reassess what your purpose is."
三個月後，小美做出了一個令所有人驚訝的決定：她主動組織了一場部門午餐會，地點選在公司附近的一家溫馨小餐廳。這次，她不再是被動的受害者，而是活動的主導者。她可以選擇自己舒適的環境，控制聚會的節奏，最重要的是，她終於明白了自己真正想要的是什麼。
Three months later, Xiao Mei made a decision that surprised everyone: she proactively organized a department lunch meeting at a cozy small restaurant near the company. This time, she was no longer a passive victim but the leader of the activity. She could choose her comfortable environment, control the pace of the gathering, and most importantly, she finally understood what she really wanted.
阿德勒的第二個魔法：界線的藝術
大衛與Linda的婚姻風暴
在台中市西屯區的一個小公寓裡，30歲的軟體工程師大衛正坐在電腦前，螢幕上播放著他最喜歡的YouTuber頻道。他的眼睛發亮，彷彿看到了另一個世界。這個YouTuber專門分享程式設計技巧，每支影片都有上萬的觀看次數，評論區裡充滿了感謝和讚美。
In a small apartment in Taichung's Xitun District, 30-year-old software engineer David was sitting in front of his computer, watching his favorite YouTuber channel on the screen. His eyes were shining as if he saw another world. This YouTuber specialized in sharing programming tips, with each video getting tens of thousands of views and comment sections full of gratitude and praise.
「如果是我，我一定可以做得更好，」大衛在心裡想著。他已經在這家科技公司工作了五年，每天重複著相同的代碼編寫工作，薪水雖然穩定，但內心的創作熱情正在慢慢消退。他夢想著能夠自由地創作內容，與全世界的程式設計師分享知識，甚至可能靠此維生。
"If it were me, I could definitely do better," David thought to himself. He had been working at this tech company for five years, repeating the same coding work every day. Although his salary was stable, his inner creative passion was slowly fading. He dreamed of being able to freely create content, share knowledge with programmers worldwide, and maybe even make a living from it.
但每當他向妻子Linda提起這個想法時，家裡就會爆發激烈的爭吵。Linda是一名小學老師，個性謹慎保守，她認為大衛的想法太不切實際。
But whenever he mentioned this idea to his wife Linda, fierce arguments would erupt at home. Linda was an elementary school teacher with a cautious and conservative personality who thought David's idea was too unrealistic.
那個週五晚上的爭吵是他們婚姻中最激烈的一次。大衛興奮地告訴Linda，他已經註冊了YouTube頻道，甚至錄製了第一支影片。Linda聽後臉色瞬間變得蒼白：「大衛，你瘋了嗎？我們還有房貸要還，還計劃明年生孩子，你竟然想辭職去做這些不務正業的事情？」
That Friday night's argument was the most intense in their marriage. David excitedly told Linda that he had registered a YouTube channel and even recorded his first video. Linda's face instantly turned pale: "David, are you crazy? We still have a mortgage to pay and plan to have a child next year, and you want to quit your job to do these frivolous things?"
大衛試圖解釋：「Linda，妳不了解現在網路創作的潛力。那個我關注的YouTuber一個月的廣告收入就超過我三個月的薪水！而且這是我真正熱愛的事情，我不想一輩子都困在辦公室裡寫別人設計的程式。」
David tried to explain: "Linda, you don't understand the potential of online content creation now. That YouTuber I follow earns more in advertising revenue in one month than my three-month salary! And this is what I truly love. I don't want to be trapped in an office writing other people's programs for the rest of my life."
Linda的聲音提高了八度：「熱愛？熱愛能當飯吃嗎？妳知道有多少人想要你這樣穩定的工作嗎？你這樣做對得起我嗎？對得起我們的未來嗎？如果你真的愛我，就不會做出這種自私的決定！」
Linda's voice rose an octave: "Love? Can love put food on the table? Do you know how many people want a stable job like yours? How can you do this to me? How can you do this to our future? If you really loved me, you wouldn't make such a selfish decision!"
這句話深深刺痛了大衛：「我自私？我所做的一切不都是為了我們嗎？為了給妳更好的生活，為了讓我們的未來更有可能性？」
These words deeply hurt David: "I'm selfish? Isn't everything I do for us? To give you a better life, to make our future more promising?"
Linda眼中含著淚水：「我不需要什麼更好的生活，我只要安安穩穩的就好。你為什麼不能為了我放棄這個想法？」
Linda's eyes filled with tears: "I don't need any better life. I just want stability. Why can't you give up this idea for me?"
就這樣，他們的對話變成了情感勒索的循環：「我為你放棄了...」「你如果愛我就應該...」「你這樣做讓我很受傷...」每個人都試圖讓對方為自己的選擇負責，卻沒有人願意為自己的決定承擔後果。
Thus, their conversation became a cycle of emotional blackmail: "I gave up... for you," "If you loved me, you should...," "You're hurting me by doing this..." Everyone was trying to make the other person responsible for their choices, but no one was willing to bear the consequences of their own decisions.
阿德勒的魔法分割線
絕望中的大衛決定尋求婚姻諮詢師的幫助。他們找到了專精阿德勒心理學的張諮詢師。張諮詢師是個50多歲的溫和女性，辦公室裡擺放著許多夫妻和家庭的合照，牆上掛著一幅字：「每個人都是自己人生的作者」。
In desperation, David decided to seek help from a marriage counselor. They found Counselor Zhang, who specialized in Adlerian psychology. Counselor Zhang was a gentle woman in her fifties, with many photos of couples and families in her office and a calligraphy piece on the wall that read: "Everyone is the author of their own life."
「你們的問題很常見，」張諮詢師聽完他們的敘述後說，「但解決方法可能會讓你們感到意外。在阿德勒心理學中，我們有一個重要概念叫課題分離(Task Separation)。」
"Your problem is very common," Counselor Zhang said after listening to their account, "but the solution might surprise you. In Adlerian psychology, we have an important concept called Task Separation."
她在白板上畫了一條直線，將左右兩邊分開：「我們來看看這個問題到底涉及哪些課題。」
She drew a straight line on the whiteboard, separating the left and right sides: "Let's see what tasks this problem actually involves."
大衛的課題區域
是否辭職成為YouTuber (Whether to quit and become a YouTuber)
如何規劃創作內容和時間表 (How to plan content creation and schedule)
如何處理收入不穩定的風險 (How to handle the risk of unstable income)
承擔創業失敗的可能後果 (Bear the possible consequences of entrepreneurial failure)
對自己的人生選擇負責 (Take responsibility for his life choices)
Linda的課題區域
是否接受大衛的決定 (Whether to accept David's decision)
如何調整自己的生活計劃 (How to adjust her life plans)
是否尋找額外收入來源 (Whether to seek additional income sources)
決定繼續這段婚姻還是選擇分開 (Decide whether to continue the marriage or separate)
對自己的選擇和感受負責 (Take responsibility for her choices and feelings)
張諮詢師繼續解釋：「課題分離的核心原則是：每個人只能為自己的課題負責，不能**干涉(interfere)**他人的課題，也不應該讓他人為自己的課題承擔責任。」
Counselor Zhang continued explaining: "The core principle of Task Separation is: each person can only be responsible for their own tasks, cannot interfere with others' tasks, and should not let others take responsibility for their own tasks."
Linda激動地說：「但我們是夫妻啊！他的決定當然會影響我！」
Linda said excitedly: "But we're married! His decision will definitely affect me!"
「影響是客觀存在的，」張諮詢師點頭，「但誰來承擔這個影響的後果才是關鍵。Linda，大衛辭職確實會影響家庭收入，但如何應對這個影響是妳的課題。妳可以選擇支持他，也可以選擇增加自己的收入，甚至可以選擇結束這段婚姻。這些都是妳的自由，也是妳的責任。」
"The impact is objectively real," Counselor Zhang nodded, "but who bears the consequences of this impact is the key. Linda, David's resignation will indeed affect the family income, but how to deal with it.
阿德勒的第三個魔法：他人即地獄
「他人即地獄」源自沙特的法國戲劇
「他人即地獄」這句名言是出自法國哲學家沙特的一部戲劇《閉門》，講述三個被囚禁起來的鬼魂等著下地獄，但是在等待之中，鬼魂彼此不斷欺騙、折磨、相互牽制，最終他們領悟到，即使還沒下地獄，現在已經猶如身在地獄了。
「永遠和他人在一起，這情況本身就是地獄。」這句話並非字面意義，不是將他人視為地獄，或形容人與人的敵對關係，而是強調「他人的存在和看法對個體自我意識產生的影響」，只能通過自我選擇，才能獲得自由。
（資料來源：TNL The News Lens 關鍵評論網）
第一層涵義
如果你不能和其他人和睦相處，導致你們之間的關係緊張，恐怕你必須承受對方給予的反作用漠視、不理解、不幫助等情形。只有適當地站在對方的角度思考，才能避免他人成為你的地獄。
第二層涵義
若你不能正確看待別人對於自己的評價和判斷，只因為對方的評價就使你如坐針氈，太過嚴重時，你就可能會成為不斷取悅他人的小丑。
我們不應該讓自己總是處在「過於在意別人」的精神地獄，別以他人的目光作為行動標竿，也要理解不要太在乎他人對你的評價而讓自己受傷害。為了避免這樣的負面現象，要透過自省內察，更正確地認識自己，不過度依賴他人的評價，提升個體的自主性。
第三層涵義
如果你不能適當地對待自己，老是將失敗歸咎於其他人和社會，那麼你就是你自己的地獄。每個人都必須和自己對話，適時地改變對自身的看法，才能過得更自在。
他人即地獄：小雅的職場覺醒之路
第一層地獄：關係的緊張
25歲的小雅剛進入台北一家知名廣告公司擔任創意企劃。她個性直率，總是直接表達自己的想法，認為這樣才是誠實的表現。在第一次部門會議上，當主管提出一個她認為不切實際的創意方案時，小雅立刻舉手發言。
Twenty-five-year-old Xiao Ya had just joined a famous advertising company in Taipei as a creative planner. She had a straightforward personality and always expressed her thoughts directly, believing this was a sign of honesty. In her first department meeting, when the supervisor proposed what she considered an unrealistic creative plan, Xiao Ya immediately raised her hand to speak.
「我覺得這個想法完全不符合目標客群的需求，」小雅毫不客氣地說，「而且預算規劃也不合理，這樣做只會浪費公司資源。」整個會議室瞬間安靜下來，主管的臉色變得有些難看，其他同事都低頭看著自己的筆記本。
"I think this idea completely doesn't match the target audience's needs," Xiao Ya said bluntly, "and the budget planning is also unreasonable. Doing this would just waste company resources." The entire meeting room fell silent instantly, the supervisor's face darkened, and other colleagues looked down at their notebooks.
從那天開始，小雅發現自己彷彿被同事們孤立了。沒有人邀請她參加午餐聚會，工作上的合作也變得格外困難。當她需要其他部門的協助時，總是被推三阻四；當她提出建議時，大家要麼敷衍回應，要麼直接忽視。
From that day on, Xiao Ya found herself seemingly isolated by her colleagues. No one invited her to lunch gatherings, and workplace cooperation became particularly difficult. When she needed help from other departments, she was always given the runaround; when she made suggestions, people either responded halfheartedly or ignored her directly.
文法重點1：過去完成式 (Past Perfect)
例句：From that day on, Xiao Ya found herself seemingly isolated by her colleagues.
用法：描述過去某個時間點之前已經完成的動作或狀態
第二層地獄：評價的枷鎖
三個月後，小雅意識到自己的處境，開始拼命想要改善與同事的關係。她變得極度在意別人的看法，每天早上花一個小時精心打扮，希望給人留下好印象。她開始察言觀色，在會議中不再發表任何可能引起爭議的意見。
Three months later, Xiao Ya realized her situation and began desperately trying to improve her relationships with colleagues. She became extremely concerned about others' opinions, spending an hour every morning carefully dressing up, hoping to make a good impression. She began reading facial expressions and body language, no longer expressing any potentially controversial opinions in meetings.
有一次，她聽到茶水間裡兩個同事在談論她：「小雅最近怎麼變得這麼奇怪？以前至少還有自己的想法，現在完全像個應聲蟲。」「對啊，而且她穿得也太刻意了，感覺很做作。」這些話像刀子一樣刺進小雅的心裡。
Once, she overheard two colleagues talking about her in the break room: "Why has Xiao Ya become so strange lately? At least she had her own thoughts before, now she's completely like a yes-person." "Yeah, and she dresses too deliberately, it feels very artificial." These words pierced Xiao Ya's heart like knives.
從那以後，小雅陷入了更深的焦慮。她不知道自己應該表現得直率一些，還是應該繼續保持低調。每天上班前，她都會在鏡子前糾結半天：「今天穿這件會不會太正式？」「等等開會時我該說話嗎？」「他們會怎麼看我？」
After that, Xiao Ya fell into deeper anxiety. She didn't know whether she should be more straightforward or continue keeping a low profile. Before work every day, she would struggle in front of the mirror for a long time: "Is this outfit too formal today?" "Should I speak up in the meeting later?" "What will they think of me?"
文法重點2：條件句 (Conditional Sentences)
例句：She didn't know whether she should be more straightforward or continue keeping a low profile.
用法：表達假設、條件或不確定的情況
第三層地獄：自我的囚籠
半年過去了，小雅的工作表現越來越差。她把所有的問題都歸咎於同事的排擠和公司文化的問題。「都是因為他們不給我機會，」她在日記裡寫道，「這個公司根本不重視真正有能力的人，只看重會拍馬屁的人。」
Six months passed, and Xiao Ya's work performance got worse and worse. She blamed all problems on colleagues' exclusion and company culture issues. "It's all because they don't give me opportunities," she wrote in her diary, "this company doesn't value truly capable people at all, only those who know how to flatter."
直到有一天，她的大學好友美琪來台北出差，兩人在咖啡廳見面。美琪聽完小雅的抱怨後，沉默了一會兒，然後說：「小雅，妳有沒有想過，也許問題不完全在他們身上？」
Until one day, her college friend Mei Qi came to Taipei on a business trip, and they met at a café. After listening to Xiao Ya's complaints, Mei Qi was silent for a while, then said: "Xiao Ya, have you ever thought that maybe the problem isn't entirely on their side?"
小雅有些生氣：「妳這是什麼意思？妳是說都是我的錯嗎？」
Xiao Ya was somewhat angry: "What do you mean? Are you saying it's all my fault?"
美琪搖搖頭：「我不是說妳有錯，而是說妳可能需要換個角度看這件事。妳記得大學時候嗎？妳也總是很直接地批評別人的想法，但那時候大家都還能接受，為什麼？因為我們知道妳是真心想要幫助大家把事情做得更好。但現在聽妳說話，我感覺妳更像是在證明自己比別人聰明。」
Mei Qi shook her head: "I'm not saying you're wrong, but you might need to look at this from a different angle. Do you remember in college? You were always very direct in criticizing others' ideas, but everyone could still accept it then. Why? Because we knew you genuinely wanted to help everyone do things better. But now listening to you speak, I feel like you're more trying to prove you're smarter than others."
這句話讓小雅愣住了。她開始回想自己這半年來的行為：確實，她總是把焦點放在證明別人是錯的，而不是真正想要解決問題。當她批評主管的創意方案時，她提出替代方案了嗎？當同事需要幫助時，她主動伸出援手了嗎？
These words stunned Xiao Ya. She began reflecting on her behavior over the past six months: indeed, she always focused on proving others wrong rather than genuinely wanting to solve problems. When she criticized the supervisor's creative plan, did she propose alternatives? When colleagues needed help, did she proactively offer assistance?
覺醒與改變
那個週末，小雅決定重新審視自己。她意識到，她一直在三個層面上創造著自己的「地獄」：
That weekend, Xiao Ya decided to re-examine herself. She realized she had been creating her own "hell" on three levels:
首先，她沒有學會換位思考，總是以自己的標準要求別人，自然會導致人際關係的緊張。其次，她太過在意別人的評價，失去了自己的authenticity（真實性）。最後，她把所有問題都推給外在環境，從來不反省自己的行為。
First, she hadn't learned to think from others' perspectives, always demanding others meet her standards, naturally leading to tense interpersonal relationships. Second, she was too concerned about others' evaluations, losing her authenticity. Finally, she blamed all problems on external environment, never reflecting on her own behavior.
週一回到公司，小雅主動找到主管道歉：「我想為之前在會議中的不當發言道歉。我的出發點是好的，但表達方式確實有問題。下次我會先仔細思考，並準備建設性的建議。」
Monday back at the company, Xiao Ya proactively approached her supervisor to apologize: "I want to apologize for my inappropriate comments in the previous meeting. My intentions were good, but my way of expression was indeed problematic. Next time I'll think carefully first and prepare constructive suggestions."
她也開始真心關注同事的需求，當有人需要協助時，她會主動提供幫助。漸漸地，辦公室的氣氛開始改善。雖然改變需要時間，但小雅終於明白了：地獄不是他人，而是我們選擇與他人互動的方式。
She also began genuinely caring about colleagues' needs, proactively offering help when someone needed assistance. Gradually, the office atmosphere began to improve. Although change takes time, Xiao Ya finally understood: hell is not others, but the way we choose to interact with others.
阿德勒與沙特：兩大哲學思想的對話
沙特的存在主義 vs 阿德勒的個體心理學
有趣的是，沙特的「他人即地獄」與阿德勒心理學中「被討厭的勇氣」概念存在著深刻的哲學對話關係。這兩個看似矛盾的觀點，實際上從不同角度探討了同一個核心問題：個體如何在他人的凝視下保持自由？
Interestingly, Sartre's "Hell is Others" and the concept of "The Courage to Be Disliked" in Adlerian psychology have a profound philosophical dialogue relationship. These two seemingly contradictory viewpoints actually explore the same core question from different angles: How can individuals maintain freedom under the gaze of others?
第一層對話：凝視的權力 vs 課題分離
沙特的觀點
沙特認為「他人的凝視」會將我們物化(objectification)。當小雅在會議室中感受到同事們的目光時，她瞬間從一個有主體性的「自我」變成了被評判的「客體」。這種凝視具有權力性，迫使我們按照他人的期待來定義自己。
Sartre believes that "the gaze of others" objectifies us. When Xiao Ya felt her colleagues' eyes in the meeting room, she instantly transformed from a subjective "self" into an object to be judged. This gaze possesses power, forcing us to define ourselves according to others' expectations.
阿德勒的回應
但阿德勒會說：「課題分離告訴我們，他人的評價屬於他人的課題，我們無法控制，也不需要負責。」小雅的痛苦不是來自他人的凝視本身，而是來自她選擇將他人的課題攬到自己身上。
But Adler would say: "Task separation tells us that others' evaluations belong to their tasks, which we cannot control and are not responsible for." Xiao Ya's pain doesn't come from others' gaze itself, but from her choice to take on others' tasks as her own.
第二層對話：真實性的悖論
存在主義的困境
沙特強調「真實性」(authenticity)，認為我們必須authentically地存在，不能「壞信念」(bad faith)地逃避自由。但矛盾的是，當我們過度意識到他人的存在時，我們反而失去了真實性。小雅越是想要「做自己」，越是被他人的反應所束縛。
Sartre emphasizes "authenticity," believing we must exist authentically and cannot escape freedom through "bad faith." But paradoxically, when we become overly conscious of others' existence, we lose our authenticity. The more Xiao Ya wanted to "be herself," the more she was bound by others' reactions.
阿德勒的解決方案
阿德勒提供了更實用的解答：「被討厭的勇氣」意味著我們要有勇氣承受他人不喜歡我們的可能性。這不是要我們故意去惹人討厭，而是要我們從「獲得他人認同」的目標導向中解脫出來。
Adler provides a more practical answer: "The courage to be disliked" means we must have the courage to bear the possibility that others might not like us. This doesn't mean we should deliberately annoy people, but that we should free ourselves from the goal-oriented pursuit of "gaining others' approval."
第三層對話：自由的實現方式
沙特的「被拋擲性」
沙特認為我們被「拋擲」(thrown)到這個世界中，必須在他人的存在下做出選擇。我們的自由是「受情境限制的自由」(situated freedom)。小雅無法選擇不與同事互動，但她可以選擇如何回應這種互動。
Sartre believes we are "thrown" into this world and must make choices in the presence of others. Our freedom is "situated freedom." Xiao Ya cannot choose not to interact with colleagues, but she can choose how to respond to such interactions.
阿德勒的「生活風格」
阿德勒則提出「生活風格」(lifestyle)的概念，認為我們可以選擇自己的人生態度。關鍵不在於改變他人或環境，而在於改變我們看待問題的角度。小雅的轉變正體現了這一點：她從被動的受害者變成了主動的選擇者。
Adler proposes the concept of "lifestyle," believing we can choose our life attitudes. The key is not to change others or the environment, but to change our perspective on problems. Xiao Ya's transformation embodies this: she changed from a passive victim to an active chooser.
阿德勒與沙特的思想在現代職場的應用智慧
1. 承認沙特「他人即地獄」的現實
首先承認沙特所說的結構性問題：在群體中，我們確實會面臨被他人定義的風險。現代職場的360度評估、同事評價等制度都體現了這種「凝視的權力」。
First acknowledge the structural problems Sartre mentioned: in groups, we indeed face the risk of being defined by others. Modern workplace systems like 360-degree evaluations and peer reviews embody this "power of gaze."
2. 運用阿德勒「課題分離」的智慧
但同時運用阿德勒的課題分離，區分什麼是我們能控制的，什麼是不能控制的。我們能控制自己的行為和態度，但不能控制他人的反應。
But simultaneously apply Adler's task separation, distinguishing what we can control from what we cannot. We can control our behavior and attitudes, but not others' reactions.
3. 培養「被討厭的勇氣」
最終目標是培養在必要時被討厭的勇氣。這不是要我們變得冷漠或自私，而是要我們能夠為了重要的價值和目標，承受他人不認同的風險。
The ultimate goal is to cultivate the courage to be disliked when necessary. This doesn't mean we should become indifferent or selfish, but that we should be able to bear the risk of others' disapproval for important values and goals.
阿德勒、沙特哲學思辨的結論
沙特和阿德勒實際上在不同層面上是互補的：沙特幫助我們理解問題的結構性本質，而阿德勒提供了實際的解決策略。「他人即地獄」提醒我們保持警覺，而「被討厭的勇氣」則給了我們行動的方向。真正的智慧在於：
Sartre and Adler are actually complementary at different levels: Sartre helps us understand the structural nature of the problem, while Adler provides practical solution strategies. "Hell is Others" reminds us to stay vigilant, while "The Courage to Be Disliked" gives us direction for action. True wisdom lies in:
既要意識到他人凝視的權力，又要保持選擇自己道路的勇氣。
Being aware of the power of others' gaze while maintaining the courage to choose our own path.
